hear me roar!

i skipped out on the aaco tourney this year - only the second time in 6 years that i have not played, and the last time was the bar exam. but DC’s beach bbq fell on the same day, and since i don’t get to see him much, it was just a bit higher on my priority list.

it was a beautiful day - totally clear by the time we arrived. food was plentiful, and we indulged. and the alcohol was definitely DC’s style, came in all forms and containers. i ended up drinking sangria out of a large water jug because i was tired to constantly be pouring it into a small cup. i guess that’s my style. i caught up with a ton of friends, mostly bruins. met a bunch of new people. and the most surprising of all was seeing two familiar faces, after many years of absense. one was a high school friend of CT- whom i have really met only once or twice, and one was a girl whom i had met just out of college. in any case, it just reaffirms how small this world really is.

MS and i had to rush back to get ready for CW’s bachelorette party - started with dinner at basil thai and the post dinner festivities at asiasf. CW looked like she was having a good time, and it’s fun just hanging out w the girls.

unfortunately, i think the wine, plus the greasy smell from asiasf gave me a massive headache and that sort of dampened my spirits a little. MS and i left early, after the “key” entertainment event of the night, while the rest of the crew partied on.

MT accused me of dealting a “crushing blow” to mr. big when we discussed the status of our relationship a few days back. i couldn’t believe it would be interpreted as such, since i was so direct and honest in my response.

i went on to say that when i asked mr. big how he felt about my response, he said “well, it sucks a little,” so i took it to mean that “it sucks a little,” and not that “it sucks a lot!”

MT couldn’t believe how i naive i was, and said i must repeat what i said, in person, to my social advisors (which include himself and the captain of monday night vball) for further evaluation.

i think he just wants to get a good laugh out of it.

i need one fun fact about me …something that’s kinda cool, different, catchy, embarassing, whatever.
it’s for a game that we are gonna play at the next summer event.

and i can’t think of anything!

were performing at the mountain winery in saratoga this week. i knew one of the summer events was to attend the concert, and i have been wanting to go all summer. anyway, yesterday at almost 4:30 pm, an email came out notifying that there were two extra tickets. i kinda figured someone would bail at the last minute. i ended up with the two tickets, after no one else in my office had expressed in an interest in them.

the next task was figure out who i can rope into going with me at such last minute. i called mr. big, asking if he could find a sub for his games. he said most likely, and was able to confirm within minutes. we met up, had a picnic in downtown saratago (food had been ordered so everyone can grab a quick bite to each before the concert), and headed up to the winery.

i never knew the scenery up there was so beautiful - the winery had a giant outdoor deck where you can see the entire valley. the concert venue was great - small enough that there was not a single bad seat in the house. we were really close to the stage -close enough where the percussions guy can see us smiling at him and smiled back.

i have always loved the gypsy kings - there is just something soothing yet exciting about flamenco music. by the end of the night, the entire place was rocking.

monday night vball was supposed to be relief from heat for our teams and a break from indoor vball. we managed to pick up a lot of new people in the last few months since we have been playing. most have been good additions, bringing skills and adding fun personalities to already a fun group. (i especially can’t complain- that is how i met mr. big.) but with group becoming larger every week, it’s hard to monitor everyone’s skill level and ensure competitive playing all the time.

yesterday, i kept on getting stuck with people who don’t know how to play. i was noticeably irritated, especially after the fifth time the guy playing the setter position didn’t think he needed to get the second ball. finally, i told him that if he doesn’t call help, even if the ball is right in front of me, i would not get it. also, it sucks having people who push up a set like 6 inches in the air - what a waste of the good passes. oh, not to mention one of my teammates totally missed my good set, and instead, hit the ball at me and it bounced off my left cheek. that was the play immediately after where i attempted to block AC, who hit into the net, but hard enough that the ball bounced off my right cheek.

i feel a sense of entitlement because we were the original people who started this “league” and i feel like i should be able to play with whomever i want, i.e., my friends and people who are good. i also miss playing with my own team, even though it’s fun to play against them and taunt each other.

in any case, i secretly complained to the captain later, and he laughed, and asked whether he should be setting up a tuesday night vball league by invite only. maybe because we seem so relaxed, people don’t take it seriously and think they can just mess around. maybe we need to start to act all intense and scare away some undesirables.

i always thought i knew – but it actually a more confusing question than I had initially thought. i thought i would like someone who is direct and doesn’t play games – i got that. i thought i needed someone who wants to spend time with me and is good to me. i have that. i thought i would like someone who shares my interest, is athletic and outgoing – i have that too. yet when the question of exclusivity came up, i straight out said i wasn’t ready for it. because he was so direct, he deserved a direct answer, albeit not one that he wanted to hear. i don’t know how i justified it, and even if my reasoning is not totally sensible, i know that in my heart that it would be a premature move that can lead to a disasterous situation.

i don’t know what else i am looking/waiting for…

What a girl wants
What a girl needs
I wanna thank you for giving me time to breathe
Like a rock, you waited so patiently
While I got it together
While I figured it out…

was different this year: a lot less people, barely any one got thrown in. (there was no point throwing people in this year, because a lot of people were already in the pool. ) but some things remained the same: good friends, good food and a lot of fun in the pool- this year in the form of water gun battles. with the exception of this one guy who got kind of out of hand with the water gun, it was mostly good fun. and with the temperature soaring over 100, the pool water was even luke warm.

i was practically in the pool from the moment i got to the party, until the moment i left. i had gotten a hold of the big water gun early on, and managed to target a few victims, but one of them grabbed me later and dunked me in the pool. even the full water immersion didn’t keep me cool.

later that night, we went out for a friend’s bday and AC’s visit from NY. i was pretty exhausted but some occasions cannot be missed.

so i met my friend’s new boy over the weekend. i had heard stuff about him from other friends, i.e., that he is good looking, overall pretty cool guy, and very good vball player, but a total ass on the court. MT refered to him as “jekyll and hyde” and i think it’s very fitting.

i met him before the game started, and was “fortunate” enough to both play with and against him during the tournament. his fierce competitiveness was apparent immediately. but at least during the game that we partnered up, he managed to tone it down a bit. either that or i just performed so superiorly where he couldn’t reasonably voice any complains…haha, it’s more likely the former.

last night he didn’t tone it down. to be fair, we played poorly as a team, all 6 of us. but he let his disappointment shown, and i was really surprised that my friend could tolerate it, even if it was on the court. he was almost down right rude to her. and she is really sweet, and i don’t know how anyone can be rude to her. i was thinking if that were me, we would have gotten into many many arguments long ago.

and as much as he is good, i know many guys who are just as good, if not better, but don’t carry nearly the same attitude. but i guess that’s why i prefer to play with those people…

last night i subbed for a friend’s ivl team - i haven’t played indoor vball in months and thought it would be fun. and it was. but it also was one of the worst conditions for playing, cuz the gym was a sauna, and people didn’t even have to move the sweat.

my team was full of subs, four including me. the three guys are strong BB/A players, and the other girl sub is very good as well. for having a totally stacked team, we lost to the last place team. it was unbelievable. i think we just didn’t take them seriously, and for not all having played together before, we had a few mis-communications. also, because the team was overall very good, each person had the tendency to over-rely on the others, thinking that someone else would get to the ball.

is still too much, i think.

towards the end of this last weekend, mr. big casually asked me whether i thought things were moving too fast. normally i would be offended by such questions, but not this time. instead, i secretly decided to use that to my advantage. so sunday night, i casually stated that we have been spending a lot of time together. he acknowledged it. he had to. we had seen each other for a good part of the day on friday, saturday and sunday.

i then tempered my statement by saying that it’s not that i want us to change anything, but i simply wanted us to both be aware of that fact, especially in light of his question from the night before. (see how i am tying all this to what he had said, although it was totally on my mind as well? this way, he must take the fall if things should “slow down,” but at the same time, it’s done in a way where he must appreciate that i am just being considerate to his concerns). in fact, i said something tothe effect of “i don’t want you to think that i am not listening to you when you voice his concerns.”

since then, we have talked only once on the phone (after i had texted him that i wasn’t going to vball on monday night) and exchanged a few emails daily. he definitely does not get in my face like a lot of people would be tempted to, especially after our conversation. but it’s not like i feel like things are weird or he is ignoring me on purpose. and i am sure that if i called him, he would be happy to hear from me. the best part is, i know he at least misses me somewhat, so he is making a serious effort to not overwhelm me with attention, knowing that i probably can’t handle it. i really appreciate that kind of thoughtfulness. (as a side note, during this whole time that i have known him, i have only left him one voice mail. the rest of times he has always picked up. granted, i don’t call often, or at weird hours, or when i know he is busy with something. but what a contrast to SL!)

in any case, i’ve already made plans for friday evening (more bday stuff), but i know i’ll get to see him on saturday at the pool party. i think it will be really fun, especially after a little time off from each other.